The uncomfortable truth about you wanting your man to change, to "step his game up", to make the right moves - which will finally allow you to have the relationship you crave so much - is that all of the above is rooted in emasculation and not loving and accepting him as he is.
Would you like to be in a relationship with someone where whatever you do is never good enough, you always hit the mark? I guess not.
But don't worry, I know exactly how you feel! Just a few years back I felt so f*cking desperate, sad and tired of all the men I've been with never truly stepping shit up.